Introducing the Periodic Calendar

It might not be the end of the world, but with The Periodic Calendar, it’s about to be the world as you’ve never experienced it before!

Utilizing a previously ignored dimension within our shared conception of time, Ape Con Myth has reconfigured the Gregorian calendar into a fully functional perpetual calendar capable of explore the past, present and future!

It is the Periodic Table of Days and to celebrate its launch, we are getting the ball rolling with an Indiegogo campaign to fund the first edition prints!

Want to find out more?  You can get the whole story at Indiegogo or explore an interactive version of the Periodic Calendar at its dedicated site!

It’s a whole new way to think about the fourth dimension, just in time for the end of the world!  Pre-order one today!

The Uniform Monday Holiday Act

The problem with holidays given a specific date, such as the 4th of July or December 25th, is that they regularly fall in the middle of the week.  While Wednesday is a fine day to take off if you’re sick or need to run some errands, calling it a holiday can be a bit of a stretch.  Most weekends don’t even earn the title, so what are we supposed to do with one day, have a parade?

Of all the problems in the world, this one was addressed by Congress back in 1968.  With the Uniform Monday Holiday Act, Washington’s Birthday, Memorial Day, Columbus Day and Veterans Day were turned into guaranteed three-day weekends.

Although Congress changed their tune on Veterans Day, returning it to November 11th in 1975, we still enjoy four Monday holidays, including Labor Day, thanks to this Act.  The catch of course is: They are uniform Mondays.  If you’ve ever spent one returning from a trip, you know they can fall short of feeling like a holiday too.  After all, it’s still a Monday.

Sometimes you can’t win for losing, but when the idea is to make everything the same, …  well, it wasn’t much of an idea to begin with.  And speaking of, you can help make the next change in our holiday schedule by supporting the effort to turn Columbus Day into Exploration Day!  For the why try Boing Boing, otherwise head on over to to find out what you can do.

[Image from the National Archives]

The October of Shocking Revelations

If you’ve got ’em, rip ’em!

That is, if you’ve got an Ape Con Myth 2012 Novelty Rip-Off Calendar, October is upon us…

Good thing we have 31 days to think about that.

Meanwhile, despite the Maya Long Count Calendar drawing ever closer to the end of the current b’ak’tun on December 21st, Ape Con Myth has taken a leap of faith and commenced production on a 2013 calendar.

In honor of the world probably not ending this year, we’re making the last calendar you’ll ever need.

Sign up here to find out when it is ready!

August, or Summer Slowly Going Down the Drain

All hands on deck!  Only one month left to use the season as an excuse to get out of working so much.

Tired of the calendar on your wall?!  Print a pdf of August (as seen above) to upgrade your calendar experience, or get a print-your-own copy of the whole Ape Con Myth 2012 Novelty Rip-Off Calendar!

A Magical Extra Day

“Poke your eye, pull your hair, you forgot what clothes to wear!”

If you don’t catch the reference, 30 Rock has stepped up and given long-overdue meaning to Leap Day.  Unless you have a better idea, it might be our best chance to give this awkward and abitrary day some life.

Meanwhile, if you find yourself wishing the rest of the year could have a bit of a twist to it, the Ape Con Myth 2012 Novelty Calendar is ready to serve up the next ten months in ways you’ve never seen before!  (Mainly because calendars become much less useful once you start messing with them.)

You can find the calendar, and very little else, in the fairly new Ape Con Myth shop!

Happy Leap Day!  Real life is for March!

2011 Calendar Results

The Ape Con Myth 2011 Have a Nice Dot Calendar is drawing to a close.  Now it’s time to wrap yours up and send a copy in for analysis.  Here’s ACM’s results straight from the home office, with weekdays in red and weekends, along with federal holidays, in blue:


Meanwhile, it’s getting about that time.  Do you have your Ape Con Myth 2012 Novelty Rip-Off Calendar yet?  Next year won’t be the same with it, order today!

The Ape Con Myth 2012 Novelty Rip-Off Calendar

Will the world end in 2012?  You wish.

The Ape Con Myth 2012 Calendar is not a doomsday calendar, but one specifically designed to get you through what by all appearances could be a pretty interesting year.

Buy one today and enjoy a year of people asking you what that is on your wall!

And to get you in the mood, here’s something to take up more of your time via BoingBoing
Ten Things Everyone Should Know About Time
A Brief History of the Apocalypse

The latter, a timeline of past, present and future predictions of Earth’s doom, starts things off on a familiar note:

“According to Isaac Asimov’s Book of Facts (1979), an Assyrian clay tablet dating to approximately 2800 BC was unearthed bearing the words “Our earth is degenerate in these latter days. There are signs that the world is speedily coming to an end. Bribery and corruption are common.” This is one of the earliest examples of the perception of moral decay in society being interpreted as a sign of the imminent end.”

Alas, it was just another Thursday.  And so it goes?

Next year, break the monotony with The Ape Con Myth 2012 Novelty Rip-Off Calendar!

Also available at Electric Works.